WOUNDED PENISES IN CHURCH ARE AN ASSAULT ON RELIGIOUS FREEDOM, POPE WARNS

In a statement addressed to American Catholics, Pope Francis has declared that barring men from church if they’ve had their willies cut off is “under attack from powerful cultural forces.

“He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord. (Deuteronomy 23:1)

“The time has come, for American Catholics to defend the religious liberty, upon which their nation was founded.

“Religious liberty is not simply the freedom of worship, but it guarantees Catholics that freedom, without forcing them to share a pew with somebody that has a strange dick.”

The Pope went on to mention that the church is fed up with women that teach, or have any authority over men (Timothy 2:11) and that if people don’t starting start getting their shit together, God is going to force feed them their own babies, as a lesson (Leviticus 26:27-30).

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